Oom bop bop
Oom bop bop
Oom bop bop
Dance (dance) dance (dance) dance (dance) yeah!
The lyrics above from “Good Vibrations” and “Dance, Dance, Dance” were some of the first words and songs my oldest daughter, Stella, spoke and sang.
Stella’s love affair with The Beach Boys began pretty innocently. Christine and I were looking for clean music that was upbeat but NOT Cocomelon. Or “Super Simple Songs.” Or Disney hits. There’s only so much an adult can take when it comes to kiddie music.
Then one day it hit me: let’s try The Beach Boys! Stella quickly began enjoying this curveball of music I threw at her.
And now we have our origin story…
I need to give context as to why I’m writing about this.
Stella still isn’t even three years old. However, she very clearly has something special about her. I swear this isn’t the typical parent overhyping their child. Christine and I have both asked each other if we are being crazy when we talk about some of the gifts we’ve noticed. Confirmation that Stella may be advanced — for now, at least — has come from everyone we interact with. People with kids at a similar age, people with no kids, people with grown kids, teachers, coaches… Stella doesn’t need a bigger head but let’s just say she gets her fair share of praise from others.
Because of all of this, it’s not totally surprising to me that Stella enjoys music from more than sixty(!) years ago and that it’s more than enjoyment — it’s active participation. She has memorized lyrics, sometimes entire songs. She plays her imaginary drums. She dances and bops her head.
Some of this is innocent — she’s a toddler playing. But some of it may mean more.
Dave Grohl, the drummer from Nirvana and founder of the Foo Fighters, wrote in his memoir that his daughter, Violet,
“…was an intensely verbal child. By the age of three, she was already speaking with the clarity and vocabulary of a much older kid, often stunning unsuspecting waiters at restaurants from her booster seat with fully enunciated requests like “Excuse me, sir? Could I please have some more butter for my bread?… I eventually realized that she had a strong aural memory and an advanced sense of pattern recognition, which made it easy for her to imitate or repeat things perfectly by ear.”
This is the closest thing I’ve ever read or heard about how we (and others) perceive Stella. It’s wildly exciting, but also a bit breathtaking — and those feelings may even turn into intimidation (how will I be able to keep up with her?) in the future. But for now, it’s super fun and it’s led to Stella falling in love with one of America’s bands.
Now a disclaimer: I also love The Beach Boys. My mom (she, too, is a big fan) went to see the band perform on Good Morning America in 2000 and I remember the positive energy she carried with her about them when she came home. So my first deep dive with the band didn’t come until I was roughly eleven. But from that moment on, I was hooked. I absolutely loved the way the band sounded, lyrically and musically. That’s never changed.
Their music has always stayed with me and it became a part of Stella’s early life. But a few months ago, The Beach Boys love hit a different level for Stella. As any parent knows, that means it hit a different level for me too.
Here’s what happened: One night while putting Stella to bed, I spontaneously started singing “Surfer Girl” to her. Those who know me know I’m not usually the spontaneous type. I can’t even remember what spurred me to sing the song, but I did, and Stella immediately synced up with me. When I got to the lyrics Do you love me? Stella responded by singing “I do love you.” Those aren’t the next lyrics but it was clear she was comprehending what I was saying. She wasn’t just lying in bed waiting for me to finish singing. She was actively participating.
From there, “Surfer Girl” grew into a nightly routine that turned into playing the song on Alexa and singing along, and then later adding Christine to the mix.* All the while, Stella’s excitement about that particular part of her nightly routine grew, too. We’ve done it almost every night since that first one. It never gets old. I imagine it never will. Plus, “Surfer Girl” fits Stella so well. She loves the beach and she’ll always be my Little Surfer Girl.
*Yes, I shared one of the most precious daddy-daughter moments with Christine. I’ll be on Santa’s “Good” list this year 😊 🎅
Around the same time the “Surfer Girl” routine began, I noticed that The Beach Boys were touring and would be in Charlotte. I immediately got excited. I could take Stella to the show! But then had to check myself. When you have a child who isn’t three but acts much older, the line for how to treat them is more blurred. Was I crossing over into something that wouldn’t be fun for Stella? Would she come to resent the music she loves so much at home after a long night in a crowded theater?
I talked it over with Christine and she was any more confident than I was about taking Stella. Additionally, I had just been laid off and we only had one income. Was it financially smart to buy tickets? We decided to wait.
May rolled around and I found myself employed once again. But the Beach Boys concert was only a few weeks away. If we were going, we needed to make childcare arrangements for our youngest daughter, Arya. This couldn’t be a spur-of-the-moment decision. Planning had to be done. We had to be sure taking Stella to her first concert — The Beach Boys as a two-year-old — was the right thing to do for everyone.
We ultimately decided we would go. Many factors played into this. The tickets were affordable. The show was to begin at 7:30 pm ET and last roughly two hours. The Beach Boys also aren’t getting any younger. Would they be back? Would we have another chance to see them?
Those last two questions probably swayed me more than any doubts I had about Stella enjoying the show. Time is not infinite. We had to go now because we may never have another chance.
Will Stella be a rock n’ roll star of her own because of the chance to see The Beach Boys as a toddler? That remains to be seen. But I was confident that her love of music would grow out of this experience and that was the other big selling point for me. Christine and I both love music. We want our children to learn about music through us and decide if it’s for them. Again, that meant we had to go!
There’s a certain magic to The Beach Boys. They represent a California utopia. Happiness, beaches, surfing, cool cars, lots of girls for the boys. Their music represents a world we imagine but usually isn’t as realistic. Real life is grayer. It’s messy and complicated. It can be overwhelming. The simplicity of The Beach Boys’ music is hard to attain on a regular basis. Yet, that’s what draws so many people like myself to their sound. Even if just for a night, we can get lost in the magical wonder of music and forget about everything outside the concert.
All of that is what I was hoping to feel by going to see The Beach Boys.
The current touring lineup of Beach Boys (Mike Love and Bruce Johnston — “official” Beach Boys — as well as Tim Bonhomme, Scott Totten, John Cowsill, Christian Love, Brian Eichenberger, Randy Leago, and Keith Hubacher) gave us an astonishingly unforgettable night. They delivered the California utopia to Charlotte. The energy was there. The musicianship was terrific. The crowd was engaged.
And Stella? She had a BLAST.
I can confidently say that Stells was the youngest child at the concert who wanted to be there. There was a mix of ages, overall, but no one as young and engaged as Stella. She ran back and forth down the aisle. She drummed along to songs on the railing. She sang. She screamed. She was a “woo girl!” She danced alone and then with Mama and Dada.
Reflecting on it now, I am relieved that Stella had such a great time. I would have been crushed if she didn’t because I’d be worried that I would’ve ruined her curiosity about music forever. Crisis averted. The “Dad of the Year Award” is now in hand 🤪
This may be the only Beach Boys concert we get to see. Who knows if they go on tour again? But last night was the continuation of a budding love of music for a sweet two-year-old Surfer Girl. I’m so excited to see where Stella’s love of music takes her (and us). And I’m supremely grateful to have something so special to share as a family.
Thank you, Beach Boys, for your music and for a memory that will live in my head forever 🎸 💜 🏄♀️
Love this!!! I'll never forget my first concert. Mom and Gram took me to see Michael Jackson. I was 4 years old and I played his music on my little record player!